Monday, January 18, 2016
Sometimes it’s like walking on a two-edge sword. You are never appreciated for the good work, but your mistakes are always pointed out and reminded about it again and again.
When it comes to parenting of a child with special needs, the responsibilities gets doubled or say it gets increased many fold. These children are low on immunity, unable to do their simple daily chores independently, have weak muscles and have various health conditions. Each day is a challenge and even a small task is a Herculean task.
1st and foremost thing is “Acceptance”. YES. Accepting that our child is different; is a huge task. Accepting that our parenting duties will never end, accepting our parenting duties are different and difficult from what we have seen and experienced is a bitter truth.
Because if we don’t accept it, then it’s difficult for everyone else to accept the truth. Frustration, depression & anger sets in and we vent all those feelings 1st on the child & then on our family members. Family may or may not understand; but that child is unable to understand “why is my mom/dad treating me like this?” Result, the child shows behavioral issues, throws tantrums, falls sick often, seeks attention, etc.
In the past 11 years, I have come across many kinds of parents; parents who care for their child more than anything else, parents who are least bothered about their kids, parents who blame their kids for their misery and make their life hell.
But I would like to ask such parents 1 question; is it the child’s fault that he/she is born different?
Recently I observed parents literally dumping their kids at their schools/centers and running away. The kids were not wearing clean clothes; previous day’s soiled clothes are not changed, they are wearing stinking clothes, their personal hygiene is not taken care of… Even if the kids are sick, parents just drop them off and leave. Nor the centre or their caretaker is informed about their sickness or the medications which have to be administered.
Some parents are so busy that they don’t even have time to provide home cooked food for their child. Their tiffin boxes consist of outside or package eatables which are either unhygienic or loaded with preservatives. Result: falling sick often, stomach infection, diarrhea, etc. Imagine, these children who are anyways low on immunity, feeding on these junk food, daily, 3-4 times a day…
I have read about old parents becoming burden on their grownup children, but children becoming a burden for their parents just because they are differently abled; they are not independent. And these parents are not of lower income group but from middle class family, always dressed impeccably.
Imagine if something happens to you and you get bedridden and your parents treat you in such manner; how would you feel? How would you react?
Parenting is a huge responsibility. Kids imitate us, learn from us. Children, who are differently abled feel more helpless than we feel, are more frustrated than we are. We need to train them, nurture them with love and care. It doesn’t mean we must pamper them. Be strict when required but don’t ignore them.
Many will say after reading this, it's easy to say; only the person who is experiencing it knows what all we have to go through…
I have been through this stage. I know how it feels to be trapped, feel frustrated. But once I understood, things became little easy for me to handle.
“Life is a Struggle, Accept it. Face it with a Smile”
Saturday, January 16, 2016
THE BROWN SAHEBS
The Raja of Teekra, a dusty and forgotten kingdom near Lucknow, gets lucky when the British Resident visits him but also brings with him a leading revolutionary. The Raja enters India's struggle for freedom and is rewarded with a berth in the cabinet of free India. He is shocked to see the ministers and officers living and operating like their imperial masters but is suitably rewarded for his silence. As he begins to enjoy the good life of Lutyens' Delhi, the British capital which India's freedom fighters abhorred, he faces only one adversary in his plans—his journalist son Pratap. A novel that will blow you away with its depiction of love, passion, intrigue and betrayal.
The Brown Sahebs is set in around our pre-independence era and continues till the present time.
The book is mainly based on the Indian political scenario which though set in pre-independence era has continued till now. Except Gandhiji, none of the characters real names are disclosed. Though a fictional work, it won’t be hard to make out whom the fictional characters resemble in real.
The narration of the pre-independence era, the political situation at that time in country is well explained. The book is an eye opener explaining how and why common people of India inspite of having attaining freedom are still not able to enjoy their freedom rights. It explains how really a system works.
For readers who are not politically inclined or have least interest in politics, this book may sound bit boring and slow paced. But as you continue reading, it creates interest and you feel you can't keep the book down (as it did to me) as it creates curiosity. All the characters; Pratap, his father Raja of Teekra, Vidya Babu, Malati, are well etched. But more could have been told about Kavita, as to how she coped up and dealt with heartbreak. Similar with Pratap’s mother, Rani of Teekra’s character could have been described.
In short; nice read, engrossing, eye-opener, seems perfect movie material, serious reading material.
About the Author
Anupam Srivastava was born in Lucknow, India, where his novel, The Brown Saheb's first part is set. However, he never lived there as his father and mother, Ashok and Veena Srivastava, lived in different parts of India. However, Anupam spent some of his childhood and most of his vacations in Lucknow where he flew kites and learnt about the craft of pigeon-flying. He went to a boarding school near Delhi, the Motilal Nehru School of Sports, Rai, where he played cricket but earned his college colours at St Stephen's College, Delhi, in cross-country running. He studied English literature (BA Hons and MA), won the college annual poetry prize while pursuing his MA, and being sure his vocation was writing and journalism, became a journalist with The Times of India in 1993. In 1999, he was awarded the British Chevening scholarship by the British government.
In 1999, he left journalism to work with the United Nations Population Fund in India in communications. Subsequently, Anupam worked with Oxfam India Society, Unicef and other development agencies. The Brown Sahebs is his first novel and tells the story of India not taking off its colonial clothing even as it became a democracy.
Anupam is married to Radhika Srivastava, and they have two children who figure in his children's novel, A Family Secret.
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Sunday, January 10, 2016
New Year brings new hopes, new expectations new dreams and new resolutions. When we enter in 2nd last week of December, with Christmas, comes the excitement of New Year too.
New Year party, New Year resolutions and a hope that coming year will be better than the passing year.
Well like everybody else I, too, entered 2015 with dreams of joy, happiness and a hope that 2015 will be a better year for me. And today when I look back, I see that 2015 was indeed a better year compared to 2014. I discovered a new me, I got back my confidence and conquered the fear and overcame the driving phobia. J
After facing lots of problems regarding child’s hygiene in previous school I had given up hope of Prerna getting admitted into any school. But in February, her physiotherapist of past 5 years Dr. Smriti opened a day care-cum-school called Sai Aashrya. After the initial hiccups of tantrums, crying bouts etc, now Prerna enjoys her school and the activities and I know she is in safe and good hands, because after nearly 1 year I can see her development and improvement. (TOUCHWOOD)
Since my life revolves around differently abled kids, this year I decided my theme for the April’s A-Z Blogging challenge will be about them. With help of my daughter’s therapist Dr. Sujata and some inputs and help from our family homeopathic consultant Dr. Gopikrishnan Nambiar, I successfully completed that 1 month blogging challenge and the cherry on cake was one of the blog “Vitiligo” got featured in Top 14 health blogs at number 8 in popular website. (Link) What more can I ask???
Who doesn’t like cake and chocolates?? I have been making chocolates since past couple of years and had very strong desire to convert my desire and passion for baking into something worthy. So in July, I attended a basic cake workshop wherein I learned many types of cakes and fillings and in July, my dream, Chocodisiac came into existence and I delivered my 1st order of cake and chocolates. J
In month of August – September, being a part of The book Club, I had participated in #TornadoGiveaway 2, wherein we have to promote the authors and their books. And guess what, one fine day I see my name in list of winners (did the winning dance after that). If a book lover wins books definitely she/he will do the winning dance…
During the following months, I joined various groups of bakers, wherein they selflessly help and advice newbies like me. I met some awesome bakers like Prabhjot, Shivani, Divya, and many more who have always helped me whenever I got struck, also my friends who supported me in my venture by ordering cakes and chocolates from me.
Reading was my 1st love since childhood and during past few years somewhere that love got lostL. So in January 2015, Hindustan Times Brunch announced #BrunchBookChallenge; reading 30 books in 1 year, I readily took up the challenge of finding my lost love. And till December I had completed reading 34 books in all.
If 2014 was a lesson, 2015 was the exam on what I have learnt. And I must say I gave that exam and passed with flying colours. 2015 taught me to be independent, stop sympathizing with self, and take control of your life. Don’t depend on anyone else. That’s what today world demands.
These are the good tidings of 2015; it doesn’t mean I didn’t hit lows. I did, but I will take it as an experience, a lesson from which I can learn and move ahead.
Well for 2016, I think it did start with a bang as I won the Hindustan Times Brunch #BrunchBookChallenge. What could be a better way to start the new beginning…
For 2016, have decided to regain my health, learn more new things, read new authors and let things take its flow. If something is gonna happen, it will happen, brooding or crying is not gonna change it.
“I’m sharing my #TalesOf2015 with BlogAdda.”
Thursday, January 7, 2016
The Other End of the Corridor
When your dreams are tainted with lies and deceit, you have no other choice but to walk to the other end of the corridor.
Leela has nothing extraordinary about her except the dream to become famous. Her desires take wings when she gets married to a handsome boy from a respectable family in Delhi. But her dreams are shattered even before they have a chance to take flight.
She happens to meet two friends from a long forgotten past, which infuses hope and opens new avenues to realize her dormant aspirations.
Leela delves into previously unexplored paths of deception and forbidden passions that only make her stronger.
In an attempt to rediscover herself, she falls in love with life and with herself but her life takes a sudden turn again…
No matter what, Leela will continue to chase her dreams.
Where does this journey take her?
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"The corridor, I was walking down didn't have a trace of illumination. I couldn't see the other end. But I kept moving and now, I realize that more than the light, you need the determination to keep moving, keep struggling for your dreams, for your existence, for your survival."
I had lived in a dream world all my life, always blaming the circumstances for my own weaknesses. I could never gather courage to stand up to circumstances. For how long would I keep blaming others for my own shortcomings. And for how long would I keep dreaming- my dreams never aligned with the real world; my dreams and real life never converged at any point. ‘I definitely had experience but only in building castles in the air.’
About the Author
Author’s profile :Sujata Rajpal is a Corporate Communication & PR professional turned a full-time author. She holds an MPhil degree in Economics and has studied Mass Communication from Panjab University, Chandigarh. She also writes articles and short stories for publications and journals. Sujata is a yoga enthusiast and enjoys being a Toastmaster. She currently lives in Mysore.
The Other End of the Corridor is her first novel.
My Review :
The 1st thing which caught my attention was the title of the book; The Other End of the Corridor. What does it mean? Why is the book named so? It created the curiosity and curiosity killed the cat … So I started reading this book, which highlights the suffering of Leela Chopra.
We are used to reading boy-meets- girl, falls in love, face opposition or any other problems but finally end up living happily ever-after. Or a girl is married young, she faces harassment and torture from in-laws or husband, her knight in shiny armor comes to rescue her, they fall in love and have a happy ending to their story. But one thing I can tell you this is not that type of book which has a happy ending.
The author has taken care of minute details while describing the life of Leela and her middle class life style. But I found the story bit repetitive (as now-a-days most of authors are writing about women and their suffering). Only change I liked is the climax of the story, which was bit different and was not expected. But otherwise the story is bit predictable.
But it’s a must read as it highlights the people’s perspective regarding arranged marriage and women. It’s also an inspiration to girls who subject to domestic violence considering it as their fate. Debutant Author Sujata Rajpal has done a nice job of writing and bringing out feelings of a middle class innocent girl Leela; those feelings which at some moment every girl must have felt when she is forced to give up her dreams and pushed in matrimony just because she is a girl. And when she tries to complain she is hushed up saying its part of life, learn to bear it.
Witten in simple language, awesome writing… great work Sujata Rajpal.
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